Dear Mrs. McVeigh,
My husband’s whole family recently went on vacation. When we got back my sister-in-law decided to post the pictures that she took on her Facebook page. To my horror, she posted pictures with me in them and I am wearing a two-piece bathing suit. I do not mind being seen in a bathing suit in front of my family and strangers on the beach, but not thrilled about a lot of people I know seeing me in one. I had to tell my husband to make her take the pictures down. Do you think I over-reacted?
Feeling Too Exposed
Dear Feeling Too Exposed,
I understand why you feel this way, and I think when it comes to questionable pictures of any type being put on Facebook or anywhere on the Internet, permission should be asked and granted by the other parties in the picture. These types of pictures would include bathing suits, out of normal behavior or clothing, and children that do not belong to the person posting them.
Dear Mrs. McVeigh,
I am a really big Facebook user, and it seems like people like to report every detail of their relationships. I have seen engaged friends who change their status from “Engaged” to “It’s Complicated” just because they had a fight. Do you think we have gotten to the point where people are giving way too much information? Do I really need to know every fight and comment that couple’s have with one another? I think it is also really rude. What is your opinion on this?
Dear Facebook Fan,
I think that is rude and disrespectful to your significant other, and in bad taste to air your dirty laundry on Facebook, or any other forum such as this. Relationship issues should be kept between two people. If someone is having problems, confiding in a friend in person or by phone is fine, but emails are dangerous, and Facebook is downright inappropriate. Next time you have a friend change his or her relationship status, call him and ask him is he needs someone to talk it over with. Maybe he will get into that habit and stop publicly criticizing his significant other.
My two older sons have a tough adjustment period to one another every summer. It takes them 2 – 3 weeks to get used to being around each other 24 hours a day. They have always gotten along very well, and were at one time best friends. During this adjustment period they can get along when it is just the two of them, but add in our youngest son, and/or a friend or two, and it leads to trouble.
It not pleasant to hear them argue with each other at home, but when we are in public, I just about lose it when I hear them fight. I am very embarrassed that they would cause a scene and carry on in front of other people. The whole world does not need to hear their petty issues with one another. One day we are driving as a family to an outing, and I am giving them the “don’t fight in public” talk before we arrive to our destination. My husband then interjected the real reason why people should not fight in public – it makes other people feel very uncomfortable.
We have all been there. You are out to dinner with another couple and they get into a fight. You and your spouse just look at one another, and then look down, not knowing what to do or say. You end up looking at your food in silence, and pray that the couple will quickly kiss and make-up. When they don’t an uncomfortable silence occurs, and you try to bring up a new subject. The only one discussing it with you at first is your spouse. One person out of the fighting couple then realizes he or she better salvage the situation and tries to jump in, but it just isn’t that real of a discussion. The whole evening gets cut short and ends up a disappointing disaster.
Two days later the point that my husband was trying to make to our sons was perfectly reiterated. They go on a play date with some brothers, and the brothers get into a fight. As a result of their behavior, the brother’s mom cuts the play date short. When my kids get home they say they wish they could have stayed longer. I ask them how they felt when their friends were fighting with one another. They said they felt uncomfortable, so I then had an opportunity to drive my husband’s point home once again. They admitted it was embarrassing to hear them fight, and the light bulb in their head goes on.
Looking at the positive, I am glad that they have one another to fight with, so we can teach these type of lessons now that they will carry with them when they get older. In the car that day I explained to them that their father and I sometimes get mad at one another, but we wait until we get home to “discuss” it. No one wants to hear children fight with each other, and they certainly do not want to hear adults fight with one another. Overall it is very uncom ...
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